Gray divorce has become a hot topic in recent years. People once thought of divorce as an issue that primarily affected younger couples. However, divorce statistics over the last few decades have shown a drastic change in who files for divorce.
It is more common than ever for people in their 50s or later to divorce after years of marriage. Their divorces tend to be particularly complex, as they have decades of combined assets and debts to divide. While they may not need to negotiate shared custody of their children, family conflicts during gray divorces are common. Adult children may take sides and may blame one parent for their divorce. Older adults who understand the factors that contribute to gray divorce risk may have an easier time discussing the upcoming changes to the family with their children and grandchildren.
Why have the divorce rates among older adults increased so significantly since the 1990s?
Changing marital expectations
What people expect from marriage and their spouses is vastly different now than it was in the mid-20th century. People want partnerships. They expect more support on a practical and emotional level from their spouses than they may have previously.
A desire to share values regarding family, travel and retirement can leave people feeling dissatisfied with their marriages. Changing social expectations regarding marriage may lead to spouses recognizing that they feel unhappy about their circumstances.
Decreased stigma regarding divorce
There was once a time when a prior divorce could affect everything from an individual’s employment options to their involvement with their church. Most cultures and religions have become more accepting of divorce in recent decades.
People no longer face social ostracization or limited professional opportunities because of social stigma resulting from a divorce. Those who may have never considered divorcing previously may feel more confident choosing to end an unsatisfying relationship when they realize they are unlikely to face social consequences for doing so. The availability of no-fault divorce filings, which allow for relatively peaceful, uncontested divorces, may play a role in helping people accept the idea of a great divorce.
Regardless of why one spouse files, navigating the process carefully is of the utmost importance. Securing appropriate support and focusing on the future can be beneficial for people on the cusp of ending a long-term marriage in a gray divorce scenario.
