There are plenty of people who divorce and then insist that they were much happier before the end of their marriage. There are also many people who refer to themselves as happily divorced and live healthier, more productive lives after ending a dysfunctional marriage.
Many factors outside of someone’s control can influence their quality of life after a divorce, but there are also certain characteristics that people tend to share in common when they report more satisfaction and a happier overall life after divorce.
They are female
One of the most interesting trends in post-divorce happiness is the sex split. Women who divorce often report overall higher happiness levels than men who divorce and do not quickly start a new relationship.
They are realistic but optimistic
Those who set unachievable goals for the divorce itself or for the rebuilding process afterward may end up feeling deeply disappointed when the real-world consequences of their divorce are far different than what they anticipate. Having practical expectations founded on how the state handles property division and custody matters will help people feel more satisfied and less disappointed with the outcome of their divorce. Those with an overall optimistic perspective will more easily see the best aspects of their changing lifestyle.
They make taking care of themselves a priority
People often have to intentionally engage in self-care throughout a divorce, and those that make taking care of themselves a priority often bounce back more quickly and thoroughly. Additionally, counseling or group support sessions that help people process their divorce-related grief and anger can play a major role in how happy someone reports being after the divorce.
They take accountability
People that divorce are often eager to blame the end of their marriage on their spouse. Even those who choose to file may claim that their spouse left them with no options due to misconduct of some sort.
There are absolutely many scenarios in which it is clear that the fault for the divorce or the damage to the relationship falls to one spouse. However, people have to hold themselves accountable for their role (if any) in the failure of their relationship. Whether they tolerated misconduct for too long or enabled someone’s unhealthy habit, those that recognize how they contributed to the divorce will have an easier time recovering and avoiding the same mistakes in the future.
Identifying and cultivating the personal characteristics that increase someone’s chances of happiness after a divorce can be a very smart move for those preparing for the end of their marriage.