Custody disagreements can easily become the most emotional aspect of a pending divorce. The deep love that parents have for their children often pushes them to seek as much parenting time as they can possibly obtain. Unfortunately, when parents prioritize their own wishes during custody disputes, the situation has the potential to spiral out of control. As parents prepare to address child custody issues, they need to keep themselves grounded in reality by focusing on the big picture.
The three tips below can go a long way toward limiting the conflict during child custody negotiations and ensuring the best arrangement for a family.
Focus on the other party as a parent, not a partner
Intense emotions are common in custody disputes. Parents derive motivation from not just their attachment to their children but also the conflict that they have with the other parent. It is very easy to approach child custody in a contentious manner when focusing on how the other parent failed as a partner. It may be easier to cooperate when people start viewing the other parent as a devoted co-parent rather than a failed partner.
Keep communications professional
Every interaction between co-parents has the potential to devolve into conflict, especially when they are still attempting to settle custody matters. Many new co-parents choose to use co-parenting apps for direct communication. That way there is a written record of their conversations that they can reference. They can also prove that the other parent threatened them or made inappropriate statements when all of their communications are in writing.
Create a comprehensive plan
Many parents trying to settle custody matters focus primarily on issues such as the division of parenting time and the allocation of decision-making authority. They may not necessarily address details about parenting which could cause conflict later. Parents have to work cooperatively to raise their children. They often share decision-making authority in addition to sharing time with their children. They can create parenting plans that guide their decisions as their children mature.
When parents have already set rules for when children can have their own cell phones, what sports they can participate in and what household responsibilities they should have, it is easier for parents to work with one another. They can maintain a more effective co-parenting relationship when they share standards and expectations for their children.
Parents trying to navigate child custody matters may need the insight and advocacy of a legal professional, and that’s okay. Learning about the law and having a neutral perspective can make it easier for parents to effectively address custody issues.
